First Mate
Capt'n Barnacle has decided that
it's time there was a first mate on this vessal. S/V "Coyote" will be making
her virgin voyage....or is that maiden voyage...or could that be shakedown
cruise....sometime in the near future. With Barnacle Bill making preparations
for retirement, he be needing to locate his first mate before time runs
out.....otherwise, he goes by hisself....(that is a word)
Please read the list of qualifications
which follow.
I'm a look'n!
I'm a downright lunitic, funny,
adventurous, layed back and know how to dress (shorts, tee's and sandles).
I'm compassionate, loving, and easy to get along with. I sleep in the nude
if the weather is right and love to watch a great sunset from the cockpit
(where you steer the boat from). I'm 5' 10", 150# soak'n wet, beautiful
sandy grey hair...(or what ever the hell you call it ) with a long ass
pony tail (just till I retire), pretty darn healthy considering the stuff
I eat. I'm looking for my first mate/companion/soulmate/lover/best
friend/possible wife (heavens forbid) all rolled up in one. I have no expectations
of the type of woman I'ld like to meet, but I'm sure she'll have no extra
baggage, free to go off exploring the vast expanses of the seas, in good
shape healthwise and physically fit (big tits not required). I'll bet she's
not a jealous person either. This lady is ready to start a new life completely
different from life as we know it today. Living on a sailboat, layed back
lifestyle, sailing away to new places, living the life of the rich and
famous on a fixed income.
This is an adventure ladies. A
dream. A new existance.
Now for the important stuff.....
All applicants must meet all the
following:
1. Must have first hand experience
in operating bilge pumps. (in case we
are sinking)
2. Must be able to climb a 50 foot
mast to loosen stuck sails and lines
3. Must know difference between
a blue rope and a red rope
4. Able to steer the boat back
to where Capt'n fell off
5. Makes a "mean" cup of coffee
6. Must be nice to Reebok.....Captain's
dog
7. Must be nice to Captain
8. Able to operate onboard electrical
equipment....sanders, grinders, and
drills
9. Not afraid of getting a little
oil on her hands....changing oil in engine
10. Must be versed in nautical
terms like port, starboard, galley, salon,
Captn's berth and especially head
11. Able to prance around deck
and swim in the nude.......but only at sea
12. Able to clean fish....then
cook them
13. Able to accurately fire a 44
magnum pistol...in case of pirate attact |
